This has been circulating on the internet as an e-mail, and I came across it via Ace Pryhill.
The Top Ten Reasons Why Gay Marriage is Wrong
- Homosexuality is not natural. Real people always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, and air conditioning.
- Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.
- Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.
- Heterosexual marriage has been around a long time and hasn’t changed at all; women are still property, blacks still aren’t supposed to marry whites.
- Straight marriage will be less meaningful if homosexual marriage were allowed; the sanctity of Brittany Spears’ 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.
- Heterosexual marriages are valid because they produce children. Homosexual couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn’t be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren’t full yet, and the world needs more children.
- Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.
- Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That’s why we have only one religion in North America.
- Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That’s why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.
- Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven’t adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans.
Internet Forward
Yes. Those reasons are close-minded and pathetically presented. In fact, they’re so pathetic, bigoted and irrational, that one might begin to doubt their sincerity. 😉
Camille, it’s a fucking joke!
Dear lord, is the world dominated by morons or am I just unlucky enough to meet them all?!
This sight gets funnier each time I log on, love it!! some of you are proving the English theory that the Americans dont get irony true, however I am happy to say that most of you are proving us wrong!! Those of you that oppose Gay people and Gay marriage need to get a life! If you aint Gay what affect is it going to have on you anyway? live and let live, make love not war etc etc money make the world go round? Bollocks sex and love does!! merry christmas one and all
Umm…. Emma? In defense of America- I got it. Real Americans may fail Geography, but that doesn’t mean we’re hopelessly dense; just lazy and weird. ^_^
sorry if i caused any offense Beki, not my intention, which is why i said that most of you are proving us wrong!!
The comment was aimed at the arseholes that werent spotting the irony, not those of you that did. England is just north of France by the way 😉
Really? Now I just need to figure out where France is, and I can go visit you! My mother would be so proud.
You didn’t offend me, though; I have a sister a year and a half younger than me. Live with Diana for a year, and nobody can offend you unless they’re really, really trying. I also defy anyone on this planet to say to her face that homosexuality is wrong. I don’t know about her girlfriend, but she’d sure has hell take offense.
I love my little sister….
I guess I should comment on what I just read. Whom ever had written this Top 10 Reasons thing, must be living in the past. Women are not property, Blacks are people to, and Gays are not sinners. Each year, Gays get more support from the Heterosexual community. Now finally we now have the right to marry under the law. I am not going to marry my cat, or my fish. This person needs to stop acting like a 13 year old child. I would hope people reading that crap, would disagree with all top 10 reasons. This is 2005, lets all start accepting everyone.
[sigh] this is getting kind of old at this point. It would be nice if people would read at least SOME of the comments before posting their own. Maybe then they would see all the things we’ve been saying about satire. I guess that’s just too much to ask from today’s ‘immediate gratification’ crowd.
Is it really that true that 99.9!% of Americans are completely inable to understand satire?
IT’S A FUCKING JOKE!
Hello everyone. Again I am here to say a few things now that I have read all of the comments on this website, about Gays and Same-Sex-Marriage. I am troubled about the negative comments made about Gays and the stereotypes made about Gays. Ok, first thing. I am a proud Gay Man who has been proudly out since 1999. Many people here think or believe that I and 99% of Gays choose this lifestyle, when actually we don;t choose this lifestyle, this is what we were born as. I don’t find women sexually atractive as I do men. I could live the Heterosexual lifestyle, but why do that? Wouldn’t I be living a lie? Yes! Someone said it is a sin as it states in the Bible. The bible is a book that Christians follow, that has been written by men for men or women. I think that Judging others are not intended to be left for humans but for god. I know I will be judged by god when I die, and I should have people tell me how to live my life. People have used the word Fag, which is something people shouldn’t use. Why call me a “FAG” when I know I am. People should get over themselves. Gay Marriage does not affect the heterosexuals who marry, directly or indirectly. I yet have to see a straight persons marriage fall to pieces because I got married. HAHAHA.
Marriage whether it is for a “2%” of the population, which by the way is an opinion, and not factual. Studies have been conducted on Straight men and Gay men, and they found that during childbirth, a fetus’s brain must have the right cells to make it a straight or gay individual. Gay men biologically have moreestrogen in the body then straight men, as not to affect the physical make up, also known as the X/Y.
They also stated that Gays are not “F*#@ed up” as some think, but we are just as normal. Some people also think that, Gay Men are 20 times more likely to sexually abuse young boys, which is also false. Gays are moreable to parent a child than a straight couple, statistics show, and not leaving the children growing up as gay.
To those who are reading this and are questioning their sexuality, and you think you are gay, you could be. This is something you must figure out for yourself. I always thank the straight people, who stand for the Gay community, and stands up for what’s right.
http://geocities.com/amberwayvesonline
THIS.
ARTICLE.
IS.
A.
JOKE.
http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=satire
http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=joke
http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=piss%20taking
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Satire
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jokes
Those people that are coming to this thread and seeing this article and not laughing and taking it seriously really need to learn the meaning of the above linked words.
SATIRE!
It’s a JOKE!
*has mental breakdown*
*joins Veratien in mental breaking-down*
It’s a beautiful satire aimed at all the holes in a traditional anti-homosexual marriage argument. You don’t have to be gay to respect the creator of this email – it took a lot of talent to create something so clever and poignant.
I don’t really want to add to the unnecessarily long political argument that seems to be going on here, (after all, it’s pretty hard to change someone’s opinion on a topic so strongly controversial as this), but I would like to say that in the recent Texas election on proposition 2 (redefining marriage as between a man and a woman), 98% of the districts voted for it. Now, I would like to make a correlation between average intelligence of a population and voting behavior. The one county that voted against the proposition (in favor of gay marraige) was the one county that houses the nation’s third largest university – the University of Texas at Austin. Considering that a fairly large percentage of Austin residents are alumni or enrolled, that would make the “average intelligence” pretty darn high compared to most other counties. Now of course this is a very poorly constructed argument, but it’s just sort of interesting.
If you’re into classical music (and fearful of “catching gay”) you better not listen to Franz Schubert (composed “Unfinished Symphony,” among others) because music history books will tell you that he was probably gay. Better put down those Elton John records too. Oh, and Queen is bad for you. Clearly gay people are just plain awful. And have zero talent.
Like I said before, a beautiful satire!
Like I always say- sometimes, a majority only means all of the idiots are on the same side.
Beki, if you were a man, I’d ask you to marry me… :p
*swoons*
Well, I’m flattered. You’re probably the first person to not come right out and ask.
But I didn’t come up with that mself; I found it online.
I actually found this post while researching stonewall and opinions for gay marriage for a paper. Lord, I’m amazed at how sarcasm completely escapes so many. I’ll refrain from any political commentary, but I’ll just say I’m “pro-choice.” I completely burst out laughing the second I read the first reason. Thanks for posting it 😉
im amazed on how people dont like gays.
yes we should just let people do what ever they want to do i mean we are in a free country right. Absolutely not there are freedoms that are taken away from us because we are power hungry greedy beings and all we want to do is feel good. You cant just let people do what ever they want or everything good would be corrupted. To understand the reasons behind my anti gay feeling probably has something to do with the spread of aids, moral decay, sexual molestation. See all you gays need to quit worrying about your own grievances in the world and start thinking about the chain reaction in our legal system our morals, our way of life and so on. I could come up with an endless list of how gay marriage would hurt America you cant simply because your gay your rationality and reasoning is flawn on this subject therefore even letting you give your opinion is is reckless enough in other words what people want is usually more important to them than what is right. If it were up to me there would be a global genocide of gays. I could mathematically prove that gays have cause more deaths and damage over the years than cigarettes, gun violence, and even the hiroshima bomb that is one reason why the bible says gays are an abomination of the human soul and if you turn your back on god just because you want to be gay and you think you should have that right then have fun in hell.
May I add that every thing you typed above is just an example of you taking advantage of the stupidity and close mindedness of the average American look at comment #64 by mark i think he could shine some light on your ignorance. you all just need to learn some tolerance life isn’t supposed to be peachy i would like to drive without insurance but that would cause problems all over America i would also like to never work a day in my life but that’s just not going to happen is it get use to it your gay nothing more that sexually retarded in a way that is your adversity in life that is your test and you have already given into temptation in other words your weak…..now go ahead and attack my sentence structure and punctuation as an attempt to make me look illiterate but that still doesn’t change the words.
With whoppers like that, why on earth would I ever need to resort to attacks on your grammar? Oh, and congrats on being the second person ever to get banned from my site.
Ah, I love the smell of a burning bigot in the morning.
For all those of you out there that blame the spread of AIDS on the gays, bare in mind that the most at-risk group is straight women aged between 18 and 25.
And to lump every gay person in with child molesters is preposterous. If I said something like “All blacks are murderers” I’d be slaughtered for it. And yet people seem to think it’s ok to say things like the seditious diatribe posted above.
Unfortunately, one of the major reasons which I have never will never visit America is the apparent extensiveness of the attitude so well demonstrated by our ‘friend’ here.
Oh, and dear, you can’t be sexually retarded. You can be sexually deviant, and believe me I am on a regular basis, but those two words just don’t go together, mmmkay? Try to stick to things listed in the Childrens edition of the Oxford English Dictionary in future, ok? That is, of course, if you can read, since trolls generally don’t have enough education to be able to. Please resume your knuckle dragging, and I’ll go back to my boyfriend. 🙂
Tata!
Oh my sweet lord, which arsehole just said that “gay’s have caused more deaths than guns”??? I am embarrased to be straight!! At least I have a Gay mother so i can distance myself from Knobheads like that! Well distance myself further than the atlantic ocean already does!
Still love the website laugh every time i read it!
OK FAGS (i can say that cause i am one) but any way my opinion(i know no body asked for it but shove it up your ass if you got a problem this comment thing is for opinions anyway) ok people dont understand how hard it is for gays to come out of the closet it was so hard for me but any ways . you are not supposed to date upon looks or judge a book by its cover so yeah a guy has a dick a girl has a pussy and boobs thats their cover if u are not dating upon looks then why would you care if it was a boy or a girl the only thing it comes down to is that boobs dick and pussy are for sex so getting married doesnt mean you need to have sex so i dont see why it is wrong being against gays is like being against blacks . Let me ask you all a question those of you that are against gays are you against blacks or other races? cause being against another sexuallity religion or race is wrong and also if you know the first amendment it says the right to freedom of speech religion and protest and kinda along those lines it gives gays a right as americans
Can… but really shouldn’t.
yeah mark i know by the way i loved what you said through out this whole thing write back
Ok, I have this to say : I am generally a happy person. I don’t hate anyone, and I like most people. That said, The people who don’t get the satire don’t deserve the time and attention that the people who DO understand give to them.
I personally am pro-gay rights/marriage etc. The gay guys and gals that I know are nicer, more relaxed, and less rampaging/psychotic than most of the straight people. They’d probably do a better job raising children than a large portion of straight parents do. The list is brilliant, in my not-so-humble opinion.
Beki and Veratien, a mental breakdown is almost what I had when reading some of the comments these people left. Having read all of them, I can safely say that an obscenely large number of people are retards. Thank you both for being intelligent and able to recognize satire and genius. Kudos for Mark, Emma, and the rest too. (Beki, you are awesome, no two ways about it).
whats so bad about having gay marriages? i mean im not gay or anything but like i have some gay friends but wats wrong with them getting married? who are they hurting? not everyone agrees with the bible it was written 100’s of years ago lots of things have changed since then….i dont see why people make a huge deal out of nothing if they want to get married let them they have my blessing…..and if they do love each other then i dont see the problem….men and women do it…if they love each other then they should get married its the same thing with gay couples!
Wow. So much can happen when one moves and looses their internet access.
Okay, so suddenly, I’m awesome. Yikes.
Anywho, the moron who thinks we should take him seriously, even though my nine-year-old cousin is far more literate than he- Grammar, spelling, punctuation, and, above all, coherence are very important, especially in a discussion like this. Your words loose all meaning when coached in such half-literate terms, and your message is completely lost.
Gah, I hate people like that. Sometimes, I’m ashamed to admit I was ever Christian.
what the hell is wrong with gay marige! I mean I’m not gay, but most of my friends are. They should have the freedom to marry who ever they want or love, even if they are of the same sex. for reason 7 I have a friends who’s perants are gay and she couldn’t be stighter! bashing on gays for marrige is like saying wicca is wrong. they aren’t! and if u have a problem with wiccans (which I am) I would cures u if it weren’t for the three times three law!
Well part of the problem is that everyone has an opinion. Alright, have your opinion, but stop interfering with other people’s lives! Let them marry if they so please – they aren’t bothering everyone else and claiming other groups shouldn’t be getting married. Here is a question for you – why would you deny happiness to someone? How is being attracted to someone of the same sex any different from your genetic propensity for tallness, or hair color? Should we stop all blondes from marrying? Of course not, that’s just dumb. As is stopping people from marrying who they care for. If you want to make someone’s life miserable, then you are an evil, sadistic person. Coming from a straight guy, I’m telling all you anti-gay marriage people to leave them alone, and focus on something else! Go steal candy from a baby or something…
I believe you all are a bunch of narrow minded idiots. Stop worrying about everyone else. If you feel a certain way about then so be it. But don’t hide behind the bible.
i was just curious for those of you that are against gay marriage, what are your reasons besides being unatural. i am writing a paper against gay marriage, and i don’t really know anything about them. i say if they want to by fags, then let them be
Can I just point out that the “It’s unnatural!” argument is complete bollocks, as there is an entirely bisexual species of chimp (the Bonobo’s), there is a pair of gay penguins at London Zoo (or at least, another Zoo nearby), Swans regularly pair off with members of the same sex to raise Cygnets, and closed-minded fundamentalists have the thought capacity and ability to construct a good argument of a dead single-celled amoeba. 😀
my friend didnt get the humor but i got it at once…those are all good points, and I’m using this for a project. Thanks!
Fags are fucking stupid, you can’t make kids with two dicks, I’m really tired of all this shit I really want all faggots to dissappear and I want everyone slse to shut up!!!
fucking sick muther fucker you should all fucking die
Aww bless… *pets the troll*
Shouldn’t you be in your cage at the zoo?
Apparently they’re in their cage in the library at the University of Maine, whose IT director and Dean of Students both got notified of how these fine students are using University computers to rant about their genocidal fantasies.
I love you… 😀
Hm, actually it came through a proxy on that network being used by K-12 schools and public libraries in Maine. My letter was forwarded to the correct people. Makes me feel a little better… it’s probably just a bunch of snot-nosed kids instead of college students.
Look, its a simple as this, we live in a country where there is a division of church and state, and not to mention equal rights. So to deny a person with a different sexual orientation than the majority is unjust and against all that our constitution. ALL RELIGION ASIDE!!! All these arguments about the slipper slope theory are insane. We are talking about two adults who love each other and want to commite there lives to each other. Some of you don’t seem to understand that things change. After all this country has gone through with equal rights, don’t you think we should move forwards instead of backwards! Keep an open mind.
yey, My mums partner Sue has proposed to her and they are getting married this year… legal now in England.. any of you biggots wanna cross the atlantic and come tell them face to face they are wrong, bring it on.
It has been a while since i checked the sight, glad to see it is still as interesting as ever.. who ever gave me kudos a while back, cheers! though aint sure why, just reading and commenting on an amusing sight.Funny both cos of the satire and the idiots that dont spot it. 😉
Oh, I wish I’d gotten here sooner! So many posters I want to pull arounnd by the proverbial short hairs, and it’s too late! Just you wait until I get an internet connection at my house… f-in’ flamers’ll be sorry then…
Meep.
Now that that’s out of my system- I agree with Ben. Religion’s got about as much to do with this as how quickly blood cooks off steak has to do with a Vegan dinner party. You can’t outlaw gay marraige; it’s discriminatory, anti-Constitutional, and a blatant mixing of Church and State, since most all the anti-arguments are religion-based.
faggots should all go to one island and be blown up at one time by a big ass atomic bomb but thats just how i feel about it… gay marriages make me want to kill my self because god created adam and eve not adam and steve.
gay people are going to hell because god doesnt love you!!!!!
faggots!
Oooh, please kill yourself! Here, use my Colt! I’ll even lend you the bullets! Darwin would thank you. *nods*
Anyway, I don’t believe in Hell, I’m Pagan. So nyah.
Jimmy, Jimmy, Jimmy, you poor, ignorant little boy.
Whether or not some unprovable, omnicient being you choose to worship and call ‘God’ loves or doesn’t love homosexuals doesn’t matter. Religion doesn’t make our laws. Basing our laws on whether or not God approves would be justifiable grounds for another Revolutionary War.
Use that tired old Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve argument again, and I’ll whack you one with my baseball bat. The concept of Adam and Eve is one of reproduction. That’s all. It has nothing to do with whether or not heterosexual intercourse is somehow better or more natural that homosexual intercourse; heteros make babies, homos don’t. End of discussion.
Illarane, please don’t encourage the boy to act like an idiot. Can you imagine the mess he’d make trying to kill himself? Besides, he’s still alive- somebody‘s gotta love him.
You are all out of your minds gay people can put anyone as next-of-kin so why don’t you take the foot out of your mouth and get real a marriage is between a man and a woman that’s why God created Adam and Eve not Adam and Steve or Alanna and Eve
You know what, Amber? Fuck you. I’ve had it up to here with closed minded cunts in the last few days and I am currently in one of the shittest moods ever.
I am sick and tired of hearing malicious bastards like yourself tell me that I am wrong and against what God wants and that it’s Adam and Eve not Adam and Steve. Well you know what? God doesn’t exist. And neither does Jesus. So fuck off and stop telling me to live up to your false religion’s standards and that I’m against nature.
If you’ve got nothing better to do than become a seething pool of seditious malcontent then fine, but do it to likeminded people. I swear, you lot bitch about Muslims being bad; you’re just as fucking screwed-up yourselves. At least gay people don’t bomb other countries on a whim!
If you honestly think that a Bibliocentric rhyme about how the worth of a human being is directly proportional to their ability to reproduce is going to convince anyone who wasn’t already convinced, well, you’re wrong.
As pointed out by many others already, the only reason for this is religious. There is no civil nessesity for the marriage civil contract to be exclusive to only a male/female pair.
From your statement, I assume that you believe in the Biblical account of creation, and subscribe to the literal 7 day creation week. That’s cool! It would follow than that you also adhear to the 10 commandments, and thus must go to church on the 7th-day sabbath.. that being Saturday. What a good Christian you must be.
Joking aside.. i will disagree with your conclusion. THAT’S why God made Adam and Eve? I would hazard a guess that God created a man and a woman so that they would be able to reproduce and fill the earth. You can’t do that very well with two men (though they could have fun trying [grin]).
If we follow your logic, we should all run around naked, after all, God didn’t create clothes. God made Adam and Eve naked, so we ALL should be naked.
boy.. look at all the sinners running around with clothes on.
Alright, I’m sure all of you have heard this before, but I’ll toss out this line again, just because it applies here. The bible was not written by God. It did not fall from the sky. It was written by man, and mankind lies. Incessantly. Before you say, “Oh, well the writer(s) were visited by an Angel, and were told what God wants,” I’ll tell you this : I hear that every bloody day from the man on the corner. Why is he any different? Anyone who claims they’ve been spoken to by God or an Angel in this day and age is either locked away, or dismissed as a delusional, attention-seeking madman. God may or may not exist; I personally believe in him, but the church and the bible are a load of man-concocted stories with the intent of gaining power for some over others. Who are you to claim you know what God wants, or does not want? Just because some book that He didn’t write tells you so? Try again, pal.
Even if we assume that the bible is real, just for the sake of arguement, and if God created all people equal, then he obviously created homosexuals equal as well, yes? He created this world, and these people, so it follows that one of two theories are correct here : either, A) God knowingly created homosexuals, in which case they cannot possibly be “wrong”, because God is almighty, and does not make mistakes, or B) God messed up, which is impossible because GOD IS ALMIGHTY! Either way, being gay isn’t wrong. Whatever happened to “love thy neighbor,” or whatever the hell that idea was?
All religion does is contradict itself, and provide an excuse for hatred. How pointless.
ok well if all you guys love to see chicks have sex then why do you people freak out on other people as i said before some dont date upon looks but upon emotions
Jimmy let me get something straight. Do you think that this:”gay people are going to hell because god doesnt love you!!!!
faggots!” is godly in anyway. If anybody your going to hell for being so damn hateful and ignorant!!
Ya know what sickens me? The fact that so many people spend so much time and energy on keeping people that are alittle different from having our given freedoms.
why are you gay
well i don’t like gays but you can if you want its just i think its grows walking down ther street and two girls or guys are kissing. its just how i feel.
courtney
If you are asking me, then the answer is im not gay. Im straight but i don’t believe its our job to to judge people. Why can’t we just love and accept people for who they are.
This whole issue is ridiculus because it shouldn’t even be an issue. I’m a Christian but it honestly doesn’t matter what God thinks about homosexuality because this is about the government which, in case people have forgotten, is supposed to be seperate from religion.
It also partly makes me laugh and partly makes me sad that so many “Christians” bash homosexuality. You don’t have to support it but you have no right to condemn it. Because that’s exactly what Jesus did, started pointing out groups of people and telling them they’re going to hell. Love thy neighbor but only if they’re straight, eh?
Nonono, you’ve got it ALL wrong! Love thy neighbour, but only if they’re a straight, white, evangelical Christian from the same state as you… :p
Illarane, you slay me. I wish I could print this whole long string of comments aout and tack it up on my bedroom wall…. it’d definitely be good for a laugh now and then.
Alas, the community center instructors would kill me if I tried to use that much paper.
Every time someone says something stupid and believes it, God kills a kitten! And an angel dies! And explodes! Think of the kittens! And the Angels!
I must admit, the 10 reasons are everything you feel deep in your soul and just can’t express. So simple and plain. My head hurts thinkng how people cannot get the intent of the list. But; alas, such passionate discussions are breaking down the roadblocks to a change in the mindset of contemporary people. The conversations are a necessary evil to change the thoughts of a people as a whole on the philosophy of basic human rights. All comments reflect the feelings of the author and therefore are justified. That said, some comments are so incredibly hate based and just really make you wonder how is it possible in this day and age…. but……We all have our own filters. As sad as some statements are, (truly almost brought tears to my eyes) they need to be heard and expressed. If for no other reason than to perhaps make a point of how much hatred there can be towards other human beings and perhaps learn from it. There just might be one person that finally might read this crap and think…. Oh my God!! I had no idea what kind of things these people have to put up with.” Something might just click, or a nerve get touched… and myabe, just maybe….. might have the passion to have an open mind where it once was completely closed.
So many things previously stated so eloquently by others already, if I can state one fact: It is NOT A CHOICE. Fact or opinion, some might ask. I can say with 100% certainty, it is a FACT that it is NOT MY CHOICE, but rather who I am. I was born and will die a gay man. That cannot be changed, no sooner than can a straight person get counselling to become gay.
A general observation. You watch the elections. You see a map of the United States and as the votes are cast and tallied, the states begin to fill in with red and blue color. Typically, Red states fill in the general body of the country where the cows roam and land is far and wide. People are less likely to have neighbors that are differnt than themselves. The Blue states, on the other hand are on the coastlines or in areas where populations are very dense and people are forced (or choose) to live side by side. Whatever the reason, be it the weather, or better job opportunities, or because they were born there, people
living close together tend to share ideas, get acquainted and talk to each other. They learn about their similarities and their differences. While some may never become friends as a result of being neighbors, they are at least tolerant.
In the Red States, people in general are less tolerant and live in what we call, ironically, “The Bible belt” They have fewer discussions with other people that are different than what they know or who they are. They are less likely to have access to engage in open minded conversation on “uncomforatble” matters. They are more likely to be “hard-core Bible Thumpers” because their parents were/are. They are more likely to think our laws should be based upon beliefs in their Bible.
I grew up in California, (how Blue can you get!!.) I live now in the one Blue county in Texas that voted for the gay marriage proposal, as mentioned by a previous post. Little by little, the rest of the country is slowly catching up. I sure hope for alot more “blue” in 2008.
wow. i just read about half the comments… i love getting into arguments about gay marraige. it seems to me that everyone here has said everything i would have said. the main thing i have to say is if we have “freedom of religion” then why is “god” making up all the rules? i thought that we didnt have to believe in god if we didnt want to. so then why does he control what our government decides, the same government that said we have freedom of religion.
well gay marriage is ok.. poeple need to be open and if u love someone than u love them..
that is wrong!!! women are NOT property!!!!
Polly wanna cracker? ‘Cause you sound just like a parrot to me.
It’s called a joke. Bloody feminist lesbians…
if u have to gay parents it doesn’t mean that Ur gonna turn out gay because its Ur choice to be gay Ur gay parents dint influence you threes a certain feeling you have towards the same sex that u dint have towards the opposite sex also there are many straight parents with gay kids and if Ur gonna hate on gay people then maybe its because u want to take the attention off Ur self because Ur in the closet!!!!!!!!!
WHAT THE HELL?? as LONG AS PEOPLE R IN LOVE IT shouldnt matter!!! I am bisexual and i cant fucking believe that u idiot would fucking say that shit that is the worst thing u can say and i hope that u burn in HELL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! U FUCKINg cunt muching president!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!o0o0o0andd what the fuck is wrong with the white marrying a black fucking assholes rot in hell!!!!!!
Oh.
My.
GOD.
I’ve been following this string for a while. If one more person decides to not get the goddamn joke behind the 10 arguments, and argue against their own side, I’m going to follow Beki and Veratien and have a psychotic episode.
One more thing. To ALL of the ‘Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve’ arguers out there, are you f***ing serious? I KNOW it was Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve! Hooray for you and your impressive collection of canonical knowledge! Somehow, that stunningly cerebral argument isn’t enough to change the fact that God loves me. God loves you too, despite you evoking His name to slander, abuse, and humiliate other human beings who just want to be able to fall in love.
“God doesn’t make mistakes, and He made me.”
Refute THAT logic.
Faggot – Part I
Current mood: contemplative
Seeing the massive number of gay marriage debates flooding my bulletin board has tempted me to write this.
Every time I see one of those, I want to see what people think, but at the same time, I’m really afraid to because I know there is a hoard of “against its” and I know reading their reasoning frustrates me to no end.
It is seriously sickening to see how many close minded, know-nothing people are still out there. This has to do not only with whether or not I am for or against gay marriage, but the whole gay “thing” in general.
I will also break this down into “parts” to make it easier on the eyes and hopefully to slowly win a bigger audience… I guess.
So, here’s my take on it:
First off, lets begin with the ever-so-popular, “God created Adam and Eve not Adam and Steve.”
My first reaction to this is wanting to swiftly backhand the person who said this; either that, or give him or her a nice punch in the forehead.
Secondly, I just have to ask: where the fuck are you hearing this? Did your teacher tell this to you in Sunday school when you were six? Or was it something you picked up from your great grandmother? Because, honestly, that has to be up there with lamest comebacks ever, next to “Oh you’re just ants at a picnic!”
Hello, it’s 2005 people! Not to mention, just because Adam and Eve were the first humans, does NOT justify “gayness” being wrong. So if Adam and Eve were the first humans, where did all the black people come from? And if Adam and Eve were black, where did all the white people come from? And the Asians? And the hispanics? And so on. This should tell you that they may have been the first humans created, but they were not the ONLY ones, but that’s another theory. Not to mention, in the beginning, reproduction was a necessity to get the human race started. In the beginning, it was also necessary that brothers and sisters and cousins have kids to get things going until there were so many people that God said, “Okay, that’s enough. Your kids are going to come out all kinds of messed up from here on out. Not to mention, it’s wrong if you try to have a kid with your brother,” (my own paraphrasing, if you can’t tell). And in the beginning, I say again, there were two people, not six billion.
Oh so you want to throw in the whole City of Sodom?
Centuries ago, there were four cities under the control of Satan and his devils. The worst city was Sodom. These Sodomites worshipped Satan, were possessed with devils and they hated God. Their stink reached heaven and God was fed up with them.
The real sin here was the lack of hospitality. Back then it was customary to let travelers stay with you even if they were strangers.
Yes, there was a high incidence of homosexuality among pagan cultures, so others would have seen anything associated with such as being horrifying. Homosexuality turned into something the Jews hated.
Of course these haters of God are going to push the limits by saying that they want to “know” the two angels who came with Lot into the city. They’re evil. It was homosexual RAPE that would have been the crime had it happened. They didn’t just want to “lie down” with the angels voluntarily.
Whoever R Kimelman is, he says, “In the Mideast then, once a man has entered into your home, your responsibility to his protection is your primary moral obligation, even if it’s at the expense of your own daughters. The Bible is recording a story; it is not mandating behavior.” This conflict between the men had not happened before God had made the decision to destroy Sodom.
If all the men in the city were gay, and Lot would know of this being a resident of the city, why would he then offer his virgin daughters in place of the angels? It would hardly be considered a “gift” to placate the mob. Context needs to be taken into consideration
In conclusion (on the subject of Sodom), the city was not destroyed because it was inhabited by a bunch of fags.
… to be continued.
Jesus (appropriate start since most of the postings seem to be religious) it has been a while been busy!! but this sight still makes me laugh makes me cry and makes me want to scream. Big shout out to all the biggots out there!! how you sleeping my darlings??? any nightmares about piece love and happiness? to the rest of you who think like me i say choose your battles! laugh at the twats(english word) and pity them! eventually they will learn to shut up and keep their homophobia behind closed doors where it wont offend the rest of us!!! though who would i laugh at if the homophobes vanished?? love and peace to you all x
I would like to point out that not all major religions in the world are against gay marriage. Many sects of Buddhism openly celebrate homosexual relationships. I really love debating this issue, it makes me happy. But anyway, on with the info-mation, in a study that some people did (on a really good essay that I read, Link here http://www.bidstrup.com/marriage.htm) 400 out of 1500 different species of animals observed routinely display homosexual behavior. If anyone would like to debate this with me, feel free to e-mail me at kaji_youji@yahoo.com I would love to prove you wrong! (By the way, I loved your satire, it was the greatest thing ever!)
Daniel, Amanda, while your furvor is appreciated, perhaps you should take a moment to read the list again and realize that it’s satire. The more people who scream and yell and rant about how gay marraige isn’t wrong on this thread, the stupider the pro-gay marraige set looks. If you can’t recognize satire for what it is, then maybe the best way to support the cause is to keep your mouth shut.
Adam, I love you.
Ashley DANGER – can I worship you? That was lovely, and I look forward with near-breathless anticipation to future posts from you.
As usually, Emma, I agree completely. Though I suppose if all the homophobes disappeared, we could always poke fun and archconservative rightwing chauvanist Christians.
Kalyn, dear, I’d e-mail you to argue religion, but we appear to be on the same side. Pity.
I really wanna print this whole thing out and wallpaper my room with it….
how can you say yhat people who are gay has as much right as anybody to get married, and all that crap abotu women being property and blacks not able to marry white is also crap. you shouldn’t be wrifghting any of these things
and you are a bastrad for saying any of it!!!
welcome break from my revision, got a law exam in the morning and am finding that my brain is hurting.. You are right Beki.. let the homophobes vanish and bring in the fundamentalist chrisitians. Wait!! is there any difference?? Cue the religious rants. Back to my Human Rights Act revision.. well done one and all for the recent posts.
Why is it so hard for people to recognise satire?
Ashley DANGER: If you live in England near London then I need to buy you a pint at some point. :p If not, then it’ll have to be an astral pint.
Beki: Think of the trees!!! So many reams of paper… :s Although I bet it’d look pretty when put up… :p
look, if u thin homosexuallity is wrong then you should move to atlantis because u are just stupid
homosexuallity is perfictly fine! and we should allow two ppl who are in love to get married. And FYI there is nothing in the bible about this, it is just that being gay was not an accepted thing then
thats it
-Paul
email me if you have a problem
Musicguy208@gmail.com
Good point, Illarene. I believe I once remarked on what would happen to me if I attempted to use that much paper and toner, although I have the perfect font and color for the anti-gay marraige comments: CAC Pinafore in lilac purple! It’d look so pretty and homosessual! And for the pro-gay marraige set, Andy in a nice dark red. For all the mental breakdowns and screamings of “SATIREEEE!!!!!”, I’d use a screaming blue and either Chiller or Jenkins 2.0, depending on whether or not I can find other fonts that look crazier.
Lynn, Paul, I’ll say it bluntly; shut the f*%@ up. You’re not helping. In fact, you’re making it worse. Quit while you’re ahead, and leave the arguing to those with an IQ greater than that of a houseplant. Begone, spawn of ev1l- you annoy me.
Damn, that felt good. I need stress relief and soda.
I’m a 17 year old high school student in upstate suburbia NY and many people in my immediate area have very similar arguments to what Mark has shown above. I love how he found perfect examples as to why these arguments are nullified by the things that society presents us with every day. (It’s also very funny to see how quick people are to assume that he is actually serious and that the obvious satire isn’t really there.) I am not gay but I have no problem with people who are. My philosophy is, if it makes you happy, do it. People who smoke know it’s bad for them, but they like to do it, who cares?
That’s kind of a bad example because being gay hasn’t been proven to kill you after time, but it’s all I could come up with, you get the point. Basically I believe that our society has it’s head so far up it’s butt that things may never change, but Gay’s will always have my vote to do whatever they wish to do. They’re people that make up our society and it wouldn’t be the best damn country to live in without them.
If you hate gays then I have no respect for you because you have trouble with someone else being happy. You may say it’s gross when they kiss or have sexual moments, but who asked you to watch anyways? You don’t see gays complaining about the 300 pound man who eats McDonald’s every day and goes home and makes love to his wife. Stop being so closed minded and allow other people to be happy.
i know im way too late to join this conversation, but just browsing through…
1) “It also ISN’T natural because you don’t see a guy animal humping another one in hte forest.”
well, that isn’t true. there have actually been many documented cases of homosexuality amongst animals. look it up.
2) I just want to throw out an idea, not necessarily one that I believe. if gays are trying to be accepted/respected then wouldn’t it be more advantageous for them to ABANDON, as opposed to long for, long-heterosexual institutions like marriage? why would it be good for their cause to try and be more like straight people? that’s a concept i debated with feminist movements too–shouldn’t mass feminist movements be about embracing femininity instead of masculinity?
just an idea–i’d like to hear your thoughts.
Ages of experience have taught us that the commitment of a husband and wife to love and to serve one another promotes the welfare of children and the stability of society…
some fucking pussy wrote this. Homsexuality is as bad as peadophilia
Fags, listen up. Nobody is buying your bullshit. You are fighting for an illegitimate cause that will surely lose. You will lose to legitimacy and common sense. Enjoy your very short period in history where you have a voice… it will soon come to an end, you goddamn freaks.
Some day I hope your children read this and see how lightly you would take their rape.
paedophilia doesnt just refer to paedephilic rape you fucktard, thats lik esyaing gay rap eisnt as bad as paedephlic rape
Learn how to spell; slow down when you are t y ping! Anyways, fags, just know you are a people with an identity based on where you stick you cocks. To me, that’s not really an identity… It’s almost as if all of you are total losers that need recognition so you label yourself “Queer” (Dictionary meaning- 1. Deviating from the expected or normal; strange: a queer situation.
2. Odd or unconventional, as in behavior; eccentric. See Synonyms at strange.
3. Of a questionable nature or character; suspicious.
4. Slang Fake; counterfeit.
5. Feeling slightly ill; queasy)
I don’t hate you, fags, but just know you are living a filthy fucking life, and, if there is a hell, you are surely going there.
I almost forgot, check out this site, faggot douchebags (yes, I’m sure you are aware of it, just take another look and see if any of it applys to you, disgusting, filthy pukes):
http://www.godhatesfags.com/main/index.html
Don’t forget that God also hates Sweden, America, Canada and the Westboro Bapist Church.
Also, I’ve just had the best sex I’ve ever had in my life with a man who is infinitely hotter and more intelligent than you, and I’m probably willing to guess that you’re still a virgin. 🙂
Tata, honey!
Wow. That’s quite an accomplishment. To think, you had a penis driven into your butthole, and you liked it. Just…wow. I am very jealous of you and your sexual acts.
Adios, turd!
If you want to go toe-to-toe and test your theory of my inferior intelligence, by all means, test.